Below you’ll find:
1. A realistic Year 9/10 essay writing question,
2. A model Excellence-level essay, and
3. A clear breakdown of why it earns top marks and how students can reach that level.
🏫 Year 9/10 English – Formal Essay Writing
Writing Type: Literary Essay
Length: 400–600 words
Focus: Using evidence and analysis to explore a theme or idea
Essay Question:
> “Writers often use challenges to reveal a character’s true strength.”
Write an essay explaining how a challenge helps a character grow or change in a text you have studied.
📘 Example Text: The Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins
✏️ MODEL EXCELLENCE-LEVEL ESSAY
Title: Finding Strength in Survival
In Suzanne Collins’s The Hunger Games, Katniss Everdeen’s strength is revealed through the challenges she faces in the arena. Collins uses symbolism, contrast, and internal conflict to show that true courage is not about physical survival but about holding onto humanity in a world designed to destroy it.
At the start of the novel, Katniss’s main challenge is simply staying alive. Her world is ruled by fear and hunger, and she has learned to trust no one. Collins describes District 12 as “a place where even the birds are too wise to sing,” symbolising the silence and despair that shape Katniss’s early life. This image shows her emotional numbness — she survives by shutting herself off. The challenge of the Games forces her to question that instinct, pushing her beyond the habits that kept her alive at home.
As the Games begin, Collins contrasts the brutality of the arena with moments of unexpected compassion. When Katniss allies with Rue, the language shifts from harsh and violent to gentle and lyrical: “Her smile is the smallest hint of the sunlight that once warmed our world.” This change in tone shows Katniss rediscovering empathy in the midst of cruelty. The challenge of the Games therefore becomes more than physical; it becomes moral. Collins positions kindness as an act of rebellion, suggesting that strength lies in compassion rather than aggression.
Katniss’s greatest transformation comes when she defies the Capitol by refusing to kill Peeta. Her internal conflict — between survival and morality — is resolved when she chooses dignity over obedience. The berries she holds become a powerful symbol of resistance: “One bite, and the Capitol loses its Games.” Through this imagery, Collins shows that courage can mean choosing death rather than surrendering one’s values. Katniss’s challenge is no longer survival, but self-definition.
By the end of the novel, Katniss’s strength is redefined. She enters the arena as a survivor, but she leaves as a symbol of hope. Collins uses her challenges to illustrate that true strength is not the ability to endure hardship, but the bravery to stay human through it. The Hunger Games teaches readers that integrity, not power, is what transforms adversity into strength.
🥇 WHY THIS ESSAY WOULD GET TOP MARKS
Assessment Focus What This Essay Does Why It’s Excellence-Level
Content and Ideas Develops a clear, original argument: that strength is moral, not physical. Goes beyond retelling events — interprets the writer’s purpose and theme.
Structure and Cohesion Logical 4-paragraph essay: intro, 2 body paragraphs, conclusion. Each develops a new layer of the argument. Sophisticated control of structure and flow; clear topic sentences and linking ideas.
Evidence and Integration Uses short, embedded quotations to support each point (“Her smile is the smallest hint of sunlight…”). Evidence is smoothly integrated and analysed — not just inserted.
Language and Style Academic tone with varied sentence structures and precise vocabulary (“moral conflict,” “acts of rebellion,” “self-definition”). Shows fluency, control, and formal voice suited to essay writing.
Insight / Critical Thinking Connects Katniss’s challenges to universal human ideas — integrity, compassion, identity. Demonstrates perceptive understanding of both text and theme.
🧭 How to Get Top Marks in Year 9/10 Essay Writing
1. Plan before you write
Write a one-sentence thesis that clearly answers the question.
Plan 2–3 main points that each connect back to your thesis.
2. Use PEEL/TEEL paragraph structure
Point: topic sentence introducing your idea
Evidence: a quote or example
Explain: what the quote shows
Link: back to the essay question or next idea
3. Embed quotations naturally
> e.g., Instead of “Katniss says ‘Her smile is the smallest hint of sunlight,’” write “Collins describes Rue’s smile as ‘the smallest hint of sunlight,’ suggesting warmth and hope.”
4. Analyse, don’t retell
Ask why the writer used that word, image, or event.
What effect does it have? What idea does it express?
5. Keep a formal tone
Avoid “I think” or “This shows that Katniss is cool.”
Use precise vocabulary and full sentences.
6. Finish strong
Your conclusion should sum up the big idea, not repeat the introduction.
End with a statement that shows understanding of the author’s message.